You can get it if you REALLY want.

It’s my first blog post in a while, I have a terrible sore throat and a mug of coffee, it’s 5:45am(as I write this), on a dreary day in early spring, I’m making the dreary bit up as I really can’t be arsed to look out of the window. One thing I do know however, is that I’m awake before the birds, and I have a strange urge to open my window and sing really loudly until they all wake up and give them a taste of their own medicine, they're very bloody inconsiderate.Today signals my being 3 days into my new routine of early(ish) nights and earlier mornings, which I have undertaken in the hope that I’ll become more productive, all I’ve experienced so far, has been the overwhelming sense of fatigue about 3 hours before most people even begin to think of going to bed.

I could well be at spring conference this weekend, and indeed, I wish I was, especially after Gordon Brown made an absolutely riveting speech, effectively calling the Labour party to arms, I may be exaggerating, but is it still just too little too late? Although the tories did fall one point in a YouGov poll this week, they’re still seven points ahead of Labour, and Mr Brown must be, for want of a better phrase, bricking it. People can make out we have it all under control as much as they want, but when you look at the facts and figures, a fourth term for Labour looks out of the question. Call me a pessimist, but if you can say ‘Labour have it covered’ without an ounce of doubt in your mind, you’re an idiot. It’s a sad state of affairs, and I wish I wasn’t saying it, I really do...really…

There is however one question, nay, one word which springs to mind, it goes something like this…

“Why?”

Let me elaborate. Why in their right mind, on current policy, would the British public choose the Tories over Labour? They are less discerning than I thought, which means on a scale of discerningness(that may not be a real word) from 1-10, they’re on about a 0.5, which doesn’t even appear on a scale of 1-10. They would like to, in their own words might I add, ‘cut benefits for people who won’t work’, obviously a party all about social responsibility and consideration, because it really is that simple. They advocate an end to ‘reckless borrowing’, Stamp duty and Inheritance tax yet they aim to increase the basic pension rate and NHS spending. The British public obviously believe that David Cameron is part of the magic circle. I would further scrutinise Conservative policy here, however, they only have about three.

Oh, and did I mention, that ‘you can get it if you really want’. When I say ‘it’, I mean you can become a ‘Friend of the conservatives’ and when I say ‘if you really want’, I mean if you’re a gullible fool. I’ll hand you over to somebody who knows more about it...Mr David Cameron...(He’s crazy don’t you know)...

http://www.youtube.com/swf/l.swf?video_id=U_tCG9ZQ4_w

Surely I wasn’t the only person who laughed at “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna dress up as a gangster, rah rah”. Again this is another all style, no substance ploy from the Conservatives, which I could have summarised into a few seconds of content as follows.

“Davey C here, we’ve got Facebook, Bebo and Myspace, along with some hip new director who made some gangster film that you hip young kids like, brap brap! I’m off to listen to Crazy Rascal!”

After suffering through that video, I’m fairly sure you’ve lost all faith in the human race, so on that note, I shall leave it.

Respect
Sir Humphrey G
BRAP!